I used to think writing was all about the impact your words would have on the reader. I was wrong. Now, I believe you write a memoir for the writer AND the reader. The act of writing serves the writer in the most beautiful ways. The book is for the reader—again in beautiful ways. That’s the double-whammy of writing your memoir. Let’s discuss…
This week, I'm wrapping up books nineteen and twenty. Nineteen is one I'm ghostwriting for a client who wants to share what he's learned over decades of working in a very specific industry; twenty is a personal project—a novel which involves a woman finally telling her story after decades of secrets.
After writing twenty books and working with countless clients, I now believe the act of writing is for the writer. The book is for the reader.
This is what gives writing its double-whammy effect. Let's take those ideas one by one.
The act of writing is for the writer
This is what I under-appreciated for many years. I was so focused on putting books into the world for people to read that I didn't pay attention to the absolute transformation the act of writing can offer.
I want to be clear: writing a book won't fix you. (If you even need fixing, but that is another conversation.)
Writing a book won't heal you.
Writing a book won't repair the wrongs done to you by others.
Writing a book won't make things better.
If you need that, DON'T hire a book coach. Write a journal instead. Hire a therapist. Talk to a friend. Call a crisis line.
But writing a book—as in, something for others to read—can be part of healing. It can feel good to face the wrongs done to you by others, assess them, and write about them. It can be so helpful to review the ways things are better now than they were before.
If you're coming to the book from a place where you can look at what happened to you without crumbling, then the act of writing it may be he ultimate gift to yourself. (If you still crumble when you think about "the thing," then you might not be ready for the book yet. See above.)
Because writing a book is big. It is meaningful. It gives you the space to fully explore what happened, and the voice to explain your side, and the emotion to show why it mattered.
I have worked with people who wrote and edited an entire book, then decided NOT to publish. Even then, they NEVER regretted writing their story.
The act of writing is transformational for the writer.
I don't really believe in magic, but this is as close to magic as I've been.
The book is for the reader
I talk to people who want to write their stories, and they feel desperately called to do it as something meaningful for themselves. But they also say,
"I don't want it to be all me, me, me. I don't want to sound spoiled/resentful/bratty/selfish."
And THIS is the beauty of the double-whammy. Writing is for you. But done right, the book is for the reader.
When you purposefully write a book for others to read (as opposed to a journal or a book "just to get it on the page"), it's not all about you.
It's your story, but you have crafted it FOR the reader.
You've chosen to make it useful or insightful or meaningful or relatable or revealing or surprising or entertaining or gripping or heart wrenching or encouraging or any combination of any number of things.
It's how you write a story about yourself without being self-centered. You write for the reader.
Most of my clients experience wonderful relief when they realize they can do this without being self-centered AND it is actually the path to writing the best book AND it creates the potential to help someone going through what you experienced. I mean, wowzers, right?!
The joy and the cost of the double-whammy
So, good news: Writing a book can be GREAT for you and GREAT for the person who ends up one day reading it. It's a double-whammy of greatness. Yay.
The bad news?
There is a cost.
Because no doubly-great thing comes for free. It costs time, effort, energy, and sometimes money (if you so choose) to write a great book.
You already knew that. I mean—we're talking about writing A BOOK. Of course it takes time and effort and energy, and of course you can get support if you're willing and able to pay for it. None of this is new to you.
Can you afford the cost?
The real question is: Can you afford any part of the cost, and is it worth it?
It may NOT be.
For real.
You know I love books (duh!), and I love the double-whammy of greatness that comes with writing them. But you have other things going on in your world. The time and energy costs may genuinely not be worth it for you for now.
That's okay.
Or they might be.
It might be worth the time and energy to write for you, and write a book for your reader.
As I finish up books nineteen and twenty, I see the time and effort and money my client has put into his project and I have put into my personal project. By all measures, these books have cost each of us significantly.
I will ask my client when he publishes his book and holds it in his hands, but I suspect his answer will be the same as mine.
The double-whammy is really something. It is worth the cost.
For me, at least.
And I hope for you.
Thanks,
Liz "Wh-wh-whammy!" Green
Editor, Book Coach, and Ghostwriter
Green Goose Writing
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